2009

2009 was the year to fuck up.

2009 was the year to get screwed over.

2009 was the year to forget.

2009 was supposed to be a great year.

2009 was the year you learnt who your friends are, and who matters.

2009 was the year to remember everything you learned.

2009 was the year to grow from.

2009 was to regret.

2009 was the year to forget.

2009 was the year to get comfortable.

2009 was the year to be blown out of the water.

2009 was the year to meet new faces.

2009 was the year to forget old faces.

2009 was the year to party hard.

2009 was the year to fuck up.

2010 will be better.

Fail.

I have been failing like MAD! with my blog, and for that.. I apologize. But there is no time in a day. I have so much to say, no time to say it. Once more I apologize.

UPDATE:

Single? Nay.

Doggie? Better then ever.

Sister? Still cooking up a storm.

Mom and dad? Do you really care?

Brother/Sister in law? awesome!

Xavier (the nephew)? CUTER THEN EVER!

THE SITUATION

there is so much going on right now.

not necessarily bad, not at all.

a lot of drama?-yes

a lot of confusion?-yes

i just think, I need time.. time to figure it out.

What you need to do.

Move On.

Don't hack.

Don't creep.

Leave,

Me,

Alone.

Move On?

Merry Christmas.

You have to have a little bit of faith in people. I sometimes think that I am the only one who does. I was driving out of the parking lot a night or two ago, and I was turning onto EMills PKWY, standing at the bus stop was a guy, who looked really cold, shivering, and had no gloves.

I took the initative to pull over, and ask if he was okay. He said yes, and continued to shiver. I asked him what bus he was waiting for, he said something, to connect to the 44. I take the 44. I asked him where he lived, and assured him I wasn't a killer. He told me, near Streetsville. I live near Streetsville.

I insisted to for him to get in the car, he did. He assured me he wasn't a killer. He thanked me numerous times and said it usually takes him an hour and half to get home, not including the 1/2 hour walk to his door. I felt so bad, he takes care of his younger sister, and works two jobs. One during the day, the other at night. He can't afford a car, and can barely afford the basement apartment they live in. But he does fine with what he has. His younger sister is off to university next year. So am I. He doesn't know how he will support her, but he will try. I dropped him off, not 10 minutes from my house. He thanked my again, and wished me the best Christmas ever. I did the same.

He has stayed in my head since then. All I'm saying is have a little faith in people. Believe in them. Help others out. People still surprise me to this day.

uuuuuuni

What happens when you do something to find yourself, but it just takes you on a path that makes you more confused. I can try as hard as possible, but it is impossible to know what I like, or what I want to do with myself. Where should I go? What should I do? Where do I apply?

WHAT DO I DO?

Read Much

There is so much that I read, and take in. Whether it's through other blogs, the newspapers, websites or books. I take it all in. And try incorporate the good in my life. Is it bad that I live my life through quotes.

Walls.

There are no more walls,

No more bull-shit.

Nothing left for you to figure out,

For me to question.

For us to argue over,

Or trouble our friends about.

It's done.

Everything is.

Was it a waste?

I could tell you.

Do you want an answer?

I don't think so.

I know what's happening,

What has happened.

I'll keep going,

That's all I know.

Do it.

Creep.

WHY?!

I know why I did it all.

I could explain everything.

In an instant.

Just listen,

And I'll tell.

Deja Vu?

It's not that,

Not Deja Vu.

It's a simple memory,

Almost a flashback.

I don't know if they are good,

Or bad.

Every time I remember...

Every time I think:

"The last time I was here..."

I remember.

I reminisce.

On everything I did,

You did,

They did.

On everything I believed,

You believed,

The lies.

On all the fun,

the tears,

the hate,

the doubt.

I don't know what to remember.

I wonder.

PLANS

I have all these plans.

Ready to put into action.

Ready to go.

I have everyone I love, backing me up.

And I have me, to believe.

I have all these plans.

Ready to start.

And I'm starting today.

There is just TOO MUCH!

I have learnt so much in the past weeks, in the past months, in the past year. I have grown, vertically, and mentally as well as emotionally.

I realize things I didn't before.

I'm fine now.

I'm happier now.

I smile more.

That's always a great sign.

Imma HERE!

I'm here, in the Comm Tech Room !

With Armstrong and Chad :]

"Thank You Mama!"

I know I'm like a typical kid or teen that bitches and complains about their parents. Like, my dad is always busting the balls I don't have, and my mom and I annoy each other - ALL THE TIME.

But as much as I complain, and get upset at her, she's my mom. I can't change that. And sometimes I wish I had a different life... but when it comes down to it, I do like my life.

And the one thing that breaks my heart the most, is my mom, stumbling to go to a job that she hates, and gives her aches and pains just so she can pay bills.. it breaks my heart.

I hate that my mom has to do something she hates, and even though I don't say it, ever, I do appreciate the stuff she does for me... I do, Love Her.

Thanks bud!

My friend told me he reads my blog, and that I should do a blog just about me.. So here is all that I could come up with...

I have spacers in my ears because I like them better then normal earrings

I cut my hair for good reasons

My eyelashes are mine

I don't bite my nails, but I do pick at them

I hate chipped nail polish, but I rarely change it

I shuffle my feet

I can sing

I can play guitar, flute and clarinet

I enjoy my twitter, and I wish I had time for YouTube

By the end of this year I plan on having way more then 5 holes in my body, and keeping them

I love my tattoos, all of them

I don't regret anything, I learn from anything

I don't trust easily

I don't fall fast enough

My best friends have been my best friends for a while.

I love coffee, especially tea

I actually enjoy working out.

I truly believe my voice will either make or break me.

Music sets my mood.

I truly believe my brain has no more space left

I'm forgetful, unfunny, and small.

I hate tanning, yet I love the beach.

My favourite season is fall.

That's all I could think of :]